A Slave To Crack, But Christ Bought Me Back

By: Earl Delmarter

I was eight when my mother and father split up. My father, who was left to raise me, was a full-blown alcoholic, and I began drinking alcohol that same year. At age ten, on many days, I would come home from school to an empty house. After fixing myself dinner, I would ride my bike to the city bus stop, where I would catch a 30-minute ride to karate class. I usually pedaled home about nine thirty at night, only to be welcomed by some not-so-good friends or a television show. If my father or my older sisters didn't make it home that night, I'd find myself alone as I took off to school the next morning, hoping mom or dad would greet me that afternoon. By the age of twelve, I had become a full-fledged alcoholic.

I found that alcohol and marijuana were the cure for the joy that was lacking in my life; at least it numbed the pain for awhile. Although I drank regularly and smoked a little marijuana, I remember promising myself that I'd never do anything stronger. Nevertheless, on my sixteenth birthday, while under the influence of drugs and alcohol, a family member offered me a gift. Cocaine found its way into my life.

As one could imagine, high school for me was not productive. I did, however, manage to graduate, only to find the additional freedom extremely conducive to my raging appetite for drugs and alcohol. And so it went; I was a functioning addict. I actually achieved many goals and almost reached some small dreams. For instance, I championed at many martial arts tournaments. I even taught karate for a living. Selling real estate as a member of the Board of Realtors came naturally, and I even earned "Best All Around" Soldier and came in first place in physical training competition in basic training in the United States Army. Yet, just as soon as a challenge was met, it crumbled beneath my ever-hungry appetite for the sin that I tasted early in my childhood. However, even though I was becoming more and more chemically dependent, my vow never to use anything stronger was still there.

In the midst of the storm; in the eye of the hurricane, while there was calm, God led a beautiful lady into my life and she actually married me. It was her steadfast love for Christ and for me that helped sustain me. I recall several days waking up to her standing over me praying. The love of Christ worked through Annaliese as she witnessed to me through the Bible that she read, the prayers that she prayed and through her constant attitude of forgiveness.

However, after opening our own karate school and moving out of our home area, I found myself in another peculiar situation. While drinking at the local tavern, the urge for a "pick me up" weighed heavily on me. Not knowing where to get the drugs my flesh was so in need of, I took a cab into the darkest parts of this big city, knowing the devil would not let me down. Drunk, tired and needing more drugs, I did the unthinkable. I took a hit of what was simply being called smoking cocaine. This was the beginning of the toughest ride of my life. At age 30, I had gone from a functional alcoholic/drug addict to a full-blown crack cocaine junky.

This world I allowed myself to be in was filled with sin. The guns, the fights, the madness of finding the means of getting just "one more" hit and the shame of what I had become should have been enough to scare me to stop. I could not stop! The devil was running my life. Sin gave birth to more sin. An eight year old, sneaking his father's beer, was now a 32 year old man trapped in a cold dark world; hopelessness and despair were the only feelings left. Within a year, I had lost my home and two and a half acres of land and two martial arts schools. Financial ruin would have been an understatement. Toward the end of this insane life, I wasted $10,000 in just 10 days! I was on an emotional roller coaster; my life had become wild and completely out of control. I was a slave to sin (Rom 7:14).

I tried several times throughout my life to escape this bondage. For instance, I gave my life to the Lord when I was 15 years old, rededicated my life in my early twenties and was baptized when I was 25. Soon after each of these ceremonial pledges, I began to drink and do drugs more than ever. My backsliding record was a constant source of embarrassment and condemnation. I knew that I was missing something. As a matter of fact, one of the reasons I went into the army was to get away from the constant call of my addictions. I knew at least for several weeks during basic training, I would be secluded and unable to acquire any substances. I hoped the time away would give me what I needed to resist any more temptation. However, this plan backfired! The night of graduation I got so drunk I almost missed the bus to my AIT (Advanced Individual Training) destination. This is proof that God's warning regarding how cunning the devil is is true. ("Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour.” 1 Peter 5: 8) On another occasion, after the gun I put to my head misfired, out of desperation, I began writing a letter to Rush Limbaugh thinking he might have the solutions to my problems. As funny as this may seem, I was out of options and grasping at straws.

During my final act of insanity, when I found myself selling the last of what little possessions I had and after nearly losing my wife and newborn son, I realized this must be my bottom. This is when the Lord received my undivided attention. I cried out to God to save me, and in an instant He reached down from heaven, raised my hands towards Him and spoke to my heart as he healed my body. Not only did God deliver me from my addictions, He showed me what I was lacking in my commitment to Him: Surrender, complete and total surrender. He stirred me to let go of my pride, selfishness, fear, resentments and so on. It was in this moment that God made it clear that He didn’t want to be just a part of my life; He wanted me to give Him my life. Jesus truly is the answer.

Since this surrender, God has restored my family. He mended the very heart of my marriage, and my wife and I now enjoy a union where Christ is the center. My son, Christian, is now seven years old and Caleb is nearly 3 years old, and they are both living breathing examples of the grace of God in my life. As a matter of fact the curse of addiction in my family is now broken by the power that is in the blood of Jesus Christ. God has ordained me as a minister at a local church where I am able to counsel dozens of addicts every year. (“And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.” Rom 8:28) Christ is also allowing me to use my martial arts skills as I now teach what I call "Bible Karate" to the local youth. Furthermore, He is supplying the power and I believe the means to help me complete my formal education.

Jesus Christ my Lord and Savior also has given my mother and me the opportunity to rebuild our relationship, as she lived with me and my family for a year. During this time, God led us to many heart-felt conversations that brought us to the point of confession to one another. Moreover, He led us to a place of healing called forgiveness. ("And I will restore to you the years that the locust hath eaten...” Joel 2:25)

God saved my mother and my three sisters many years ago, and He put them right to work praying for me. He also appointed many godly men to pray for me and to speak truth into my life (Roque Fajardo, Pat Doyle and Lee McNeil to name a few). And of course my wife who refused to give up on me as she diligently interceded for me. (“The effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much.” James 5:16b) Of the many things that I have experienced and learned over the years, this truth stands head and shoulders over the rest: “So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed” (John 8:36).